This Is Harder Than I Thought

This Is Harder

Than I Thought

It started as a lark

Running for president

I had grown bored

of The Apprentice

And Melania bored

of me

So I donned my flag pin

And a longer than life

Red China tie

And stood on the stage

With the rest of the crowd

Of Obama, woman, health

Care hating crowd.

In a crowd of naysayers

I crowed the loudest. My

Orange comb the proudest

And I strutted and cackled

And promised and tackled

Every issue with a madness

Unseen in politics since probably

Caligula or Nero or Nixon

On his worse day on those

Missing eighteen minutes of tape.

Now it’s been a hundred days

And I must admit to all

That being president to half

That number of states isn't

A piece of chocolate cake

Even one served to me while

I released the mother of all bombs.

So, I spend my days twittering

Explanations as to why I have

Very little success to report...except

Filling a stolen seat on the S. Court.

But I can spout contradictory statements

Or release them to my Kelly or Spicer

And they will do their best to explain

How if two wrongs don't make a right

Possibly a countless number can.

…...alan greenwood